Dating advice

Dating is not easy under any circumstances. Dating as a single dad comes with its own set of peculiar challenges. It can nevertheless be fun, exciting, and satisfying. You need only bear in mind that fatherhood does not eliminate your needs as a man. You still have the right to meet women, to court them, be intimate with them, and form new relationships. Here are a few tips on how to best do that as a single father.

DON'T LOSE SIGHT OF YOURSELF

Work and parenting your child take up the vast majority of your time. You must do both well. But you cannot as a result lose sight of the person you are. No matter the circumstances that led to you raising a child on your own, who you are at your core has not changed. You will of course have to adjust the way you express it given your current situation. However, you should not give up on your love life. Nor should you give up on your interests. If you were an athlete, an artist, or a writer before your child was born, you should continue to pursue those activities now.

YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE HOW WILL CARE

It can be hard to leave your children with a babysitter. You may feel guilty because of the long hours you spend at work and the little time it leaves you to spend with them. But just keep this in mind: you are doing the best you can. It will do you or them little good to go long periods of time without female attention and affection.

DO YOU WANT MORE KIDS

If you are dating someone new and it is taking a turn for the serious, then you must be prepared to answer this question.

Confidence is everything. It is the thing that will advance you in your job, in your relationships with co-workers, and in your dating life. This is a relatively unexplored area of dating, but it is one that everyone intuitively feels. You may be dressed to the nines, polite, attentive, sweet, and charming. You may even be fortunate enough to be naturally good looking. But without confidence you will not get a second date.

First dates are all about first impressions. You may be loosely acquainted with the person you’re going out with. However, they will only start paying attention to you on the first date. That is when they will begin to assess you as a potential partner.

The fact is people will only partner with those they believe they can count on. You must play up your strengths and downplay your weaknesses. Confidence need not mean arrogance, boastfulness, and braggadocio. You don’t need to make the date all about you and how wonderful you are to be confident. Your aim should be to give a good account of yourself.

Think about what makes you special and distinct. Focus on your interests and the things you do well and enjoy. These are the things you want to discuss and demonstrate your passion about. If you are in a profession or line of work that you love, you need not talk shop the entire time. However, you can talk about what motivated you to pursue that career and mention some of the successes you’ve had.

You should also have something good to say about yourself as a person. You are a good person. You are someone who can give a great deal of kindness, love, and affection. Your conversation should reflect that; it should convey the feeling that you are worth spending time with and loving.

There will come a time when a relationship has run its course. Everyone will have their own reason as to why and how it led to that point, but we all know how it will feel even if we try to be logical about it. A breakup is going to hurt no matter how hard you try to convince yourself that it’s not going to. The right approach is making sure that the gloomy feeling that you have does not stick with you as you try to move on. Doubting your ability to move on may actually hinder your attempts in doing so. Don’t beat yourself up too much with getting over a breakup because you’re not the only one trying to do it.

It is easy to see that the number of people that are smooth as butter when it comes to finding a person to date and dating that person for a long period of time dwarfs the number of people who are able to make commitments last. If you are thinking of distracting yourself by constantly going on dates in hopes of repeating the initial success you had with your previous relationship is not a good approach.

The memory of your ex constantly lingering is going to affect how you digest the new experiences that you have with new people. This can lead you down to a dark path like looking through old pictures of you together or even sending that late night DM asking your ex for a second (or third) chance. Before you envy your ex who seems like they’re having an easier time with moving on, you should remember that most people only post their positive memories on social media. If anything, you should avoid their social media profile altogether.

Getting over it. Moving on. It's a big leap you need to take and focus on if you want to find the right one for you.